Who will be the first openly gay All Black?

Dean Knight, writing for the Herald, makes what I would consider a fairly uncontentious point: yes, it would be lovely if people’s sexual orientations didn’t matter and no one cared, but the fact is our society still does treat heterosexuality as normal and everything else as aberrant, and people do care.  His case in point is the All Blacks.  Sure, you can argue that the sexuality of any individual All Black shouldn’t matter, but then they’d have to stop doing underwear commercials and selling their wedding pictures to the Woman’s Weekly, and that would probably be the killing blow to the New Zealand economy.

Oh, he also notes rugby culture in general might be just a tad homophobic.

Cue the outrage in the comments, which I do not recommend reading unless you’re feeling particularly in need of eye-rolling exercise or bitter cackling.  It’s almost like the Herald’s online commenters didn’t actually read the piece, the way so many jump in to say “but it shouldn’t matter if an All Black is gay!”

Yes, my dears, but don’t you dare sit there acting like it doesn’t.

That’s just ironic.  It’s the ones who start in on the blatant (oh but it’s just a FACT, you know) homophobia who will rob you of valuable warm feelings towards your fellow New Zealanders.

The big upside is that Knight makes some really key points about how rugby institutions have to be open-minded and accommodating for players who don’t fit the hetero blokey mold, and gives examples of how athletes from other codes have navigated playing-manly-sport-while-gay.  And he got published in the NZ Herald while doing so.

In a week which has been a mixed bag of awesome and sucky for the queer community, I think it’s a positive sign.

Would be nice if the Herald showed the most basic modicum of commonsense comment moderation though.


The beautiful irony of this entire post, though, is the hat-tip I must now give.  See, I don’t really read the Herald at all (though if I want online NZ news, it is marginally better than Stuff, though that’s not difficult.)

So I would never have seen this article were it not for the efforts of men’s defender and friend of Ideologically Impure, kiwi_prometheus.  Had k_p not been so offended by the notion of a gay All Black that he just had to bring it up at The Standard, so outraged, so flabberghasted that anyone could question the tumescent, masculine heterosexuality of the All Blacks … well, this post couldn’t have happened without him.

Thanks, k_p.


  1. Dan

    I’m going to be reveling in the blistering irony of his chosen handle of Kiwi Prometheus for quite some time. Yes indeed my friend, you are bringing us the light.

  2. peterlepaysan

    Actually who cares which All Blacks are queer? Probably most of them , one way or the other.

    Which ones are homosexual can only be of interest to other homosexuals.

    They are always gay after winning a game, possibly even more gay after a few beverages.

    The All Blacks are simply another performing troupe on the performance stage. Individual sexual preferences are irrelevant (provided they are legal).

    I hope you are not suggesting that All Blacks matter?

    • QoT

      It may help you in future to read things before commenting on them, peter. But I’ll give you the benefit of the doubt and assume that you’re parodying the Herald’s online commenters of whom I said, just a few mouse-scrolls above:

      “It’s almost like the Herald’s online commenters didn’t actually read the piece, the way so many jump in to say “but it shouldn’t matter if an All Black is gay!””

  3. Owesome

    If you apply the heuristic of “1 in 10 people are gay” then there should have been, historically, 111.8 gay All Blacks.

    Just saying.

    • QoT

      Indeed, but unfortunately when dealing with shitheels like k_p it’s best to stick with absolutely-verifiable stats, and there just aren’t good measurements of orientation, especially if specific to NZ, so I went with the absolute most conservative measure I could find just to make the point inarguable.