Not that difficult, really

Been in a bit of a slump recently.  In the meantime, enjoy these simple Tips for Elevator Use from Hoyden About Town – just in case “have some basic awareness of the rape-excusing culture you live in and the fact that the women around you have to live in constant awareness of Schroedinger’s Rapist” is too difficult.

Now, you are on the elevator together. Just the two of you. So, you stand there and watch the numbers together. The elevator stops, and one or both of you gets out, someone else gets in, or it’s one of those annoying stops where nobody is there and no one has hit the button for that floor. You may share a ‘huh, elevators what you going to do’ glance with each other. You may not. If you try this and she doesn’t respond, don’t be concerned. Maybe she’s not in the mood, maybe she’s thinking about the meeting she has to go to. Maybe she’s wondering if she should try the new sandwich place for lunch. Maybe she is tired and looking forward to getting some sleep. Maybe she doesn’t want to talk to strangers in the elevator. Maybe it has nothing to do with you at all.

A wee note from me to the dudes who are having a bit of a whinge about having to constantly bear in mind that they might be making someone else feel nervous or unsafe:  welcome the fuck to our world, guys. Kinda sucks, don’t it (and you don’t even have to worry that the consequences of dropping your guard are getting raped)?  How ’bout you start doing something about it instead of complaining that finally you have to face the consequences of the rape culture you seem so desperate to defend?

More on Elevatorgate from tigtog here and here, and a good analogy from Greg Laden here if you seek either understanding or an excuse to derail into how-dare-you-call-men-dogs trollery. (One must merely note that no one seems to object when the men/dogs comparison is being used to let members of your gender get away with rape.)


Statement of obvious:  not all victims of sexual assault are women; not all sexual attackers are men.  But ain’t it bizarre how the vast majority of people saying “Word” to Rebecca Watson are women, and the vast, vast majority of people saying “STFU cray-cray feminists, y do u h8 tru luv???” are men?  Gosh, you don’t think there could be some kind of, um, shared-experience-vs-deliberate-ignorance-of-privilege thing going on here, do you?


  1. Scar

    I had not heard ‘cray-cray” before. After a quick google, I now know what it means.

    • QoT

      I’m sure it derives from some adorable 90s US teen show like Dawson’s Creek or something.

  2. Munkhaus

    Great work! At first I was convinced that this was tongue in cheek, then I thought no, it’s serious! Not for long though. Great satire! Thanks!

    • QoT

      No satire here, really, Munkhaus. It certainly seems a bit ridiculous to have to explain to white / straight / cis men how to act on elevators, but apparently that’s what we have to do in this day and age.

      • Dan

        Elevators: steamy passion boxes or modes of transportation between building floors? YOU DECIDE.