How it went down pt 3: bingo

Part 1; Part 2.

ETA:  Please see below for image description.

[Click for full-size]

[Description:  a bingo board of 25 squares reading:

  • You should be more careful with your language.
  • Let’s find a middle ground by you changing your behaviour
  • He isn’t being a bully because he’s factually correct
  • I checked this with my friends and they agreed with me
  • You were triggered by that? That wasn’t triggering
  • You were triggered? But they had good intentions
  • You’re scaring people away by being too angry!
  • I wasn’t offended by this so you’t really be offended by this
  • How dare you get fed up engaging with someone who just mansplains and ignores your points!
  • This isn’t about criticising your style, it’s about you doing things the wrong way
  • You’re getting bullied? Well, I can’t help what other people say.
  • You can’t quit! I’ll destroy the whole blog instead
  • FREE SQUARE – pretend this whole thing is about someone else –
  • We’ll be different from X. But I want us to be more like X.
  • You’re scaring people away! How dare you make me the bad guy
  • Let’s not have a firm moderating policy, we can just speak our minds when it comes up. Except now
  • How dare you say I tone argumented you when I just said you should be careful with your language!
  • I don’t think it’s problematic so it must not be problematic
  • We don’t play “nice feminist/mean feminist” games! But… be nicer
  • I didn’t call you a bitch. I just said you should be less scare.
  • This should be a safe space for newbies! Should I have mentioned that earlier?
  • He wasn’t being a douchebag, he’s one of my friends!
  • You’re being bullied? How dare you make me the bad guy.
  • We’ll agree to disagree, except when you disagree you have to shut up.
  • I said you were scary and now you’re uncomfortable participating? How dare you make me the bad guy!]

ETA:  I am very honoured to have been reblogged by Jaded16India, and very thankful to abigq for taking the time to write up an image description.  When I posted this initially I was obviously a bit pissed off and chose not to take that time myself.  This was a clear expression of my ableist privilege and I will in future not prioritise my being pissed off over basic accessibility etiquette.



  1. Pingback: How it went down pt 2: self-reflection « Ideologically Impure
  2. Pingback: How it went down pt 1: tropes « Ideologically Impure
  3. felix

    Ah well. Perhaps there’s still room for some but not all of you to join forces and do something similar. Hope so.

    Happy birthday btw!

  4. George D

    “This is somewhat embarrassing, isn’t it?

    It seems we can’t find what you’re looking for. Perhaps searching, or one of the links below, can help.”


    I had drinks tonight with feminists who like to say fuck a lot, and apparently ‘douchebag’ too. Turns out fucking the patriarchy means holding its hand and cooing gentle things in its ear. Who would have known?

    • QoT

      Yeeeeah. I don’t have a problem with the principle of having spaces where newbies can learn and have things explained to them – if others have the spoons to do so, more power to them – but I think it’s a pretty obvious non-fit for me, yeah?

      • Octavia Spitifire

        The idea of you doing that is hilarious to me, I mean we MET at a debate (i.e. the argufying). I actually cannot imagine it. Sort of like you as a kindergarten teacher…

        @George: that sounds pretty good for the patriarchy. Suspiciously like the deal it already has, in fact…

        My use of the swears does exponentially increase when I have the slightest bit of alcohol. George somehow survived, with only a slightly altered opinion of his own eyes as damage.

        • QoT

          Oh shit me as a kindy teacher? “Jason. Jason! We do not refer to the pale-beige crayons as nude, it’s alienating to non-pale-beige people. I don’t care what it says on the label. Stop giggling, everyone, we’re all naked under our clothes. Yes, even your mummy and daddy, Rochelle. Which is not to imply a monogamous hetero pairing is the normative or most desirable parenting mode. Mackenzy, stop telling Michael he can’t play with doles, it’s too enforcing of gender norms. Do we all remember how to spell “norms”?”

  5. Tamara

    I am really disappointed about what happened but I will keep coming back here for my stroppery fix! I want to say the same thing to Octavia but blogger comments has thrown a wobbley. I also wanted to say I was one of the people who loved to read but did not comment.

  6. Scar

    Wow. Seriously WOW.
    This is virtually word-for-word what the Wellington Young Feminist Collective said to me.
    Stunning – and not in a good way.