Fuck rugby culture

[TW domestic abuse and rugby violence apologism]

My, has it really been 3 years since I last wrote about our fucking sick misogynist boys-will-be-boys violence-excusing rugby culture?

This time it’s Shaun Metcalf, whose soulful puppy-dog eyes probably helped him get his “second chance” at being on the Warriors team after a tragic mistake, an exuberance of youth, and terrible accident …

Oh wait, no.

In 2004 Shaun Metcalf was 16 and fucking a 15-year-old girl – possibly cheating on his “long-time partner” with whom he now has six-year-old twins – and when said 15-year old girl got pregnant, he and his mates responded really poorly, by, oh what was it?


Just, you know, average adolescent shit, boys-will-be-boys stuff.

But it’s okay, because let’s all forget Young Men Being Fucking Thugs Apologism 101:  “Let’s not let this terrible deliberate calculated assault mistake ruin a young man’s life!”

Cue everyone’s favourite “oh but they’re boys so they’re different” quote machine, Celia Lashlie!

‘We can all get caught up in the emotional image of young men booting a young woman in the stomach to cause her to abort her baby, but these were two young people … she got pregnant, he was way out of his depth, and he did a really cruel and dumb thing.

”He was caught in the moment, and what he did was the equivalent of a young man putting a noose around his neck because his girlfriend tossed him out. He has to be allowed to move forward and put his life together, and I think the ability of the NRL and the Warriors to take this young man in and help him do that is role modelling and something they should get credit for.”


“She” didn’t fucking get pregnant on her own, Celia, and it’s really awesome how your shitty sloppy language manages to buy into all kinds of tropes about evil bitches ruining men’s lives by having evil functioning uteri.

“Cruel and dumb”?  That’s one way of putting luring a woman into a situation so you and two of your mates can stomp on her stomach.

“Caught in the moment”?  Pretty long fucking moment, Celia, what with the calculated decision and the gathering of the bash-buddies and the luring of the victim and the stomping on her stomach in an assault specifically designed to induce miscarriage.

“Equivalent” of what the fuck now, Celia?  Shaun Metcalf didn’t try to commit fucking suicide, he deliberately set out to cause internal injuries to a woman he’d chosen to stick his dick into.

But hey, enough about Celia Lashlie’s blatant victim-blaming and abuse-apologism.

Because the fucking cherry on top is of course fucking rugby culture and our wonderful fucking wilful ignorance about the obvious fucking paradoxes involved.

NZRL chairman Selwyn Pearson said ”…What he did was disgusting and abhorrent but you don’t get life for murder, and I consulted a lot of experts who all said that the best thing for the boy in terms of his rehabilitation was to get back into sport.”

Point 1, Selwyn-of-the-vomitous-comments-which-I-haven’t-quoted-because-there-is-not-enough-fuck-in-the-world:  He’s not a fucking “boy”.  He’s 23.

Point 2.  Yeah, it’ll be fucking awesome for Shaun Metcalf to get “rehabilitated” by thugby culture.  He’ll apparently be surrounded by people who know that spousal abuse doesn’t have consequences for All Blacks, and rape charges are a great Women’s Day opportunity, and teaming up with your mates to violate a vulnerable woman is practically part of the job description, and will eternally be excused because “well she shouldn’t have …”

Gosh.  I can’t think why people might not be pleased to have this hero-worshipping bullshit crammed down kids’ throats

Hat tip to The Fundy Post; also covered by Sophia at In The Gateaux.


First antichoicer to imply it’s illogical for me to be outraged by assault against a pregnant woman because I’m prochoice is invited to suck it.  The rest of you can fuck right off.


  1. Robot Pie

    I…don’t even know what to say. As long as someone’s good at rugby, apparently they can get a second chance no matter what they’ve done. It’s beyond sickening. And these are the people who get held up as role models.

    • QoT

      Don’t forget the people who are vaguely good at commentating on rugby! *cough*Veitch*cough*

    • QoT

      The article says she did give birth to a healthy baby a few months later. It fails to mention her own condition of course!

      • Octavia

        Well that is the maggot icing on the shit cake, it really is.

        I don’t even, to this. How can people not see our culture of excusing misognistic violence, particularly in proud, traditionally masculine spheres, HAS TO CHANGE. At this point, what would it actually take for these arseholes to admit there was a serious problem?

  2. vesta44

    Since when do people not get life for murder?! They may not get life for attempted murder when the murder they tried to commit didn’t succeed, but a lot of times, if one commits murder and the circumstances are egregious enough, one will get life for it (unless, of course, one is a sports star of some sort, then all bets are off).

  3. Gravey Dice

    I’m always one for giving people second chances, and that people who commit horrendous crimes can best serve society through rehabilitation and transformation.

    But immersion in the sort of culture that perpetuates the sort of violence he committed in the first place is just utterly fucked. I remember being outraged at the time this happened (but I was not in the sort of space I am now where I can comment as I do).

    I can’t help but think of Foreskin’s Lament. How since the ’60s rugby culture has changed little. The viciousness of Clean is still so prevalent today.

    Oh – and I wondered whether you’d make that last comment. As I started reading I was wondering what sort of anti-choice comments would be made – you voiced my own thoughts so well in the last two sentences.

  4. Gary

    One of the articles below it is about a Warriors player who has been demoted. The demotion has nothing to do with the sexual assault charges against him. FFS.

  5. Blondie

    Holy shit – I remember reading about this case back in 2004. It gave me the shits.
    And now this mongrel is now being held up as some kind of role model rugby player??? WTF!?!?! What kind of sick misogynist bastards could excuse this kind of behaviour?

    And what kind of woman IS Celia Lashlie to blame the girl for getting pregnant? Stupid bitch. Shouldn’t Metcalf have been charged with statutory rape, on top of everything else?

    Yes, QOT, I know we have different opinions on abortion – however, just like you, I’m disgusted at anyone who would purposely hurt a woman/girl (and her unborn child) like this. The man is an animal. And so are his lowlife friends. And so too is anyone else who excuses their actions.

    • QoT

      I presume the police exercised their discretion on the statutory rape side of things as he was only a year older himself.

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  7. alex

    great post, I remember this story when it broke and was a little disturbed by the coverage at the time, but reading this post brings it all into exceptionally sharp focus. Horrible thing for one person to do to another person, I hope she hasn’t suffered permanent physical damage, though I fear the psychological damage will be permanent.

  8. John

    Rugby is the most boring and most idiotic sport in the world only Australia and NZ cares about. The rest of the world couldn’t give a fuck. Try turning the TV on at any random channel in Australia any time and there’s a 95% chance that you’ll get a glimpse of some fucking [redacted] with an IQ of 15.4 running after an egg.

    [QoT: edited to remove racist-overtoned epithet. And despite my personal objections to rugby culture, quite a few other countries do play it. It ain’t cricket or soccer but it’s still up there.]