Stunning news tonight, my fellow Kiwis: there are heaps of jobs being advertised! Truly, the recession is over. Thank God for the solid investigative journalism which has led to this miraculous revelation!
Oh, wait, no. Some poor fucking intern in the TV3 offices spent five minutes checking Seek and Trademe Jobs and gave the local WINZ office a call …
and then they just totalled all those numbers and decided it was news.
Many Kiwis will have been looking at job ads over the past year or so, and I’m pretty sure that all of them will have looked at that shiny, jobs-for-all math and thought Jesus fucking Christ are you fucking kidding me you fucking Paula-Bennett-ass-kissing piece of shit.
Protip, Gower, and every single person at TV3 who signed off on this story: you might have been better off just standing by that rubbish, because having a lead journalist say “Of course, some of those ads may be double-ups” just took your sheer incompetence straight through the other side to I don’t even know.
I mean, that’s your idea of “investigating” the numbers of jobs available? That’s the kind of pap you’re going to serve up to a Cabinet Minister for comment? That’s the level of analysis you’re going to present to the public?
Fuck me, Gower. I really hope that whatever financial or political reacharound you’re getting out of this is worth the souls of your entire bloodline unto the sixth generation.
For anyone needing clarification: “some of these may be double-ups” is a slightly massive understatement and as an intermittent job-seeker I’d happily state that 7,000 of those 27,000 “ads” are redundant – either due to replication or being “send us your CV so our books look better!” recruitment company rubbish. Which doesn’t even start on the issue of whether these are *good* jobs which unemployed people might want to risk a stand-down period for.
And while I’m ranting and pissed off, half an hour for 3News to get onto a fucking Parliamentary resignation and by-election? ARE YOU SHITTING ME?